Warning
Don't look at this webzite if you don't have a zenze of humor.
Trust the Zcience
Ask your government if Zleepzand is right for you.
Trouble Sleeping at Night?
Zleepzand is a revolutionary new ocular zupplement clinically proven (using zcience, obviously) to change your life. Whatever that means.
FZA-Approved Zythentic Rheum
After multiple zleep-ztudies, the Zleepzand Zynthetic Zecretion has been approved by both the FZA and the U.S. Zurgeon General for mass diztribution. Lawsuits pending.
This. Is. Zcience.
Don't worry, this is zcience, not pzuedo-zcience. And there will be very little zide-effects. (Only zweating, zneezing... inzanity...Liability Waivers and Compliance enforced).
At first I was a little nervous shoving biologically engineered mucus into my tear ducts, but after I reminded myself "Don't be silly - This is Zcience!" I said, "What could possibly go wrong?" And I haven't looked back.
Our Philozophy.
We zpecialize in the ztragetic deployment of zcience for the betterment of zociety.
- In the name of Zcience. And Gondor. But mostly zcience.
Biopharmazueticals for YOU
Using Zleepzand is as easy as 1,2,Z
Open the Box
We have really great packaging, it's super spiffy. Medicare pays for it anyways.
Put it in your Eyes
We reverze-engineered your ocular membrane zecretion - so you don't have to.
Trust the Zcience
You can sleep easy knowing zleepzand is designed to help you zzzleep
See what people are saying about Zleepzand
Not that it matters, the mandates are coming.
Should the government be able to tell me what to put into my eyes? Abzolutely. They keep me zafe and always have my best interest in mind.
I used to spend hours rezearching the truth before making informed decisions. I'll never get that time back. Why redo the work the FZA already did?? Just #TrustTheZcience!
It's as simple as this:
When has zcience ever zteered us wrong?
